One More Mommy

Thoughts of a mom and her husband, son, daughter, pets, friends, job (or lack thereof), house, family, trying to be more ecologically aware...

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Baby Baby Baby

So, as virtually everyone who knows me knows already, we are pregnant for the third (and last) time. I'm about twelve weeks along, but the third child neglect has already started as am I 11? or 12? Maybe 11.5 weeks? Who knows. Certainly with Luke and Courtney I had a MUCH better idea of where I stood.

But in good news, so far this time I've only gained a pound. Which didn't stop me from pulling out all the maternity clothes last night. I'm in the midst of some insane nesting/spring cleaning and I had to GET THEM OUT NOW!

Probably because I missed maternity underwear. I don't need them at all yet, but it's an attractive option to be able to pull your underwear up to your neck...

Monday, March 23, 2009

How to make sure the day doesn't pass you by

Buy your four year old a clock or watch. Place in room.

(feet running down stairs)
MOMMY! It's 4:31!!!
(feet running up stairs)


(feet running down stairs)
MOMMY! It's 4:32!!!
(feet running up stairs)


(feet running down stairs)
MOMMY! It's 4:33!!!
(feet running up stairs)


(feet running down stairs)
MOMMY! It's 4:34!!!
(feet running up stairs)

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Wakes and Funerals

It's been a rough year or so on my father's side of the family. In a little over a year, three of my uncles have passed away. Two were my father's brother, one his sister's husband. I'm not very close to my father's side of the family - my mother wasn't close to them, so when my father died (I was 11) we stopped having regular contact with them. We see them at weddings and funerals. That's pretty much how it still is except for a couple connections with cousins here and there.

So losing these uncles doesn't have a tremendous impact on my life (which is horrible to say, but true) except for the fact that these are my uncles, and their existence is simply taken for granted. They are out there, with my aunts, doing their thing.

The first uncle that passed away was cremated and there was simply a memorial lunch. No body to view, but a gathering to commemorate him.

The second uncle had nothing. No memorial that I know of (or I missed it) and no wake.

The third is having the standard wake and funeral. And I going (at least to the wake).

I don't mind wakes and funerals - and I've been to a lot. They bring closure for me, a chance to say goodbye and give some hugs. Shed some tears for a person and acknowledge their life. It's family, it's community, it's saying this person mattered. I still feel there are loose ends with the second uncle - he's somehow still out there, though he's not.

Of course, I don't mind cemeteries either (well, in daytime). The stones a physical reminder of a life, and particularly my 'family' cemetery, where a dozen plus relatives are within 50 feet of each other. So I'm off for a wake in a few days, to say goodbye to the man who looked incredibly like my father, though was nothing like him in personality.

Thursday, February 12, 2009


I can't believe my baby boy is four today - 'they' don't lie when they say it goes by quick. I remember holding him in the delivery room, alone for a few minutes - he was content, I was shaking and weak. Now, at four, he struts around like he owns the place and pretends he has crickets in his pants. He gets more and more like us every day, silly above all else.

There are a lot of ages I would like to have frozen him at, and this is no exception. I can still pick him and he wants to snuggle in at bedtime. He gives a good hug and can't wait to hang out with us. And yet, he's independent - able to go to grandma's house and spend the night, without wearing her out. He goes to sleep at bedtime without a fight (something I can't say for Courtney right now!)

He loves games, games, and more games. He'll play several board games by himself and is starting to learn some strategy. He certainly plays by the rules and will correct you if you don't! He dances, he plays soccer, he rides a bike.

Four is pretty awesome already, and we haven't even started yet.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Get Over It Already

I had a discussion this past weekend that referenced the SAHM vs WAHM "debate". I'm in a group that is made up of mothers of every variety - at home, to part time employment, to full time employment. Business owners and those that work for 'the man'. Creative types, science types, people working basic jobs just for the spending cash. Those of us who don't work and sacrifice vacations and new gadgets and remodeled kitchens to do it. (ahem, guess where I fall?)

We make these choices. Some people never wanted to stay home with children all the time. Some people do but can't afford to quit and live the lifestyle they want. And some people forget that they are making a choice.

I glanced at local moms groups and saw a group titled "Full Time Mommies" - my first thought was "Who's doing this part time?"

I have not encountered the judgemental mother - the one who thinks that you are doing it wrong because you have not made the choice she has. At least, not to the degree that I see it on the internetz, where nasty comments abound behind the veil of anonymity.

But I do see thinly veiled jealousy. The people who want to stay home, or want to be able to afford the shiny gadgets, and thus become bitter and say things with a biting edge. I don't mind the jealousy - I am unabashedly jealous of kitchens with appliances under, say 41 years old. But just admit that you are jealous.

It's been awhile since I've seen this behavior, so I'm not sure why this is resonating with me today.