In Your Face! With Cow Bone!

I have one older brother. As Charlie Sheen said to Anthony Michael Hall in Breakfast Club, my older brother was a parent's wet dream (until later in high school, anyway). He kept his room perfectly neat. He did very well in school, he didn't mouth off, and he never had cavities. NEVER.

On the other hand, my room was a disaster, I whined, and I ALWAYS had cavities. My teeth suck and I have two crowns to show for it now. They want to put on another one because basically, there's just so little of my actual TOOTH left, why even bother with fillings?

But my brother went to the periodontist because he has gum issues. And his gums are in such bad shape they're going to be putting COW BONE in his mouth (I've got a fever! And the only thing for my fever is MORE COW BONE!)

IN YO' FACE, BOYEEEEEE! My gums rock!

Celebratin' my genetic victory...